“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.”
― Paulo Coelho, The Devil and Miss Prym
Well, here it is. Since I received numerous emails and comments I must announce that this will be my final post on this blog as titled Knowthesphere. But don’t worry, I’m only changing things for the greater good, not leaving completely.
And, as this blog and I have become great companions over the past four years, I can’t leave this old friend of mine without a proper goodbye. So, here we go.
A little over four years ago my grandfather passed away from complications of kidney and heart failure due primarily to Wegener’s disease. It happened suddenly and was possibly the most sobering time of my life to watch the man who taught me how to be a man pass from this Earth.
Little did I know that this experience would open the doors of my heart much wider than I could ever fathom.
During the same time, about two months prior to his passing and for the entire year of 2012 I lived in a sparsely populated area of Upstate New York in an original Sears and Roebuck Catalog home built in the 1920’s. Not knowing a soul, and with watching the snow continually falling along with horse and buggy passing down the road as my daily entertainment, I retreated into myself.
So, one night as the snow blocked any view from my window, sitting upstairs in my room by lamplight I began to write this blog. I had no idea what to write at first, and honestly I had no idea what “knowthesphere” was going to be about.
But, as if by magic, things just began to flow.
And speaking of flowing…
My first post was a short thought about the St. Regis river that ran directly behind the house. The above image at the top of this post was what started it all. In fact, the day after taking that picture, the snow began to fall and didn’t stop for nearly four months it seemed like. Plenty of time to start a blog, and inevitably.. to write a book.
And with that, this whole thing began.
Basically I started this blog to let loose those cobwebs that sit atop thoughts that rarely get spoken or heard, cluttering the corners of the mind. I wanted to bring those thoughts out of the basement and put them into the world.
And in doing so, something else happened.
I soon began to realize that I wasn’t writing to just write. I was writing to hear myself think. Through sharing, I was reliving some very touching, uplifting and sometimes painful emotions that I’d nearly forgotten about. I was reliving thoughts that I’d had for many years about many things, never fully able to express them.
In a manner of speaking, it’s like I was walking through my own mind and dusting off old memories, those that had a profound effect on my life.
Then I realized something else.
I began getting emails, lots of them. I began seeing my number of followers increase rapidly almost every day. Comments came in large numbers and the feedback I received was more than positive. It came in the form of heartfelt gratitude.
I then realized that by baring my soul, by sharing and reliving my experiences, by sharing my own personal and unfiltered thoughts on a variety of subject matter, I was actually helping others in the process. I was opening the doors of the heart and mind within myself and within others as well.
I’m still shocked by the immediate and extremely positive response that took off and kept going. Even more shocking was the amount of views that I was receiving, as of now nearly 80,000 views and up to 1500 views per day shortly after beginning this blog. This was and still is truly humbling and exciting for me.
Personally, not to give anyone the wrong idea. I have to say that I’d never thought of myself as being able, or even qualified to inspire, uplift or make anyone think a little bit deeper.
I’m not some guru that lives in a cave, or even close to a practicing yogi. I’m as cantankerous as they come sometimes. I have many moments of anger, envy, lust and just about every “deadly sin” you can think of, and probably a few that you never even knew existed. I have a tongue that can cut like a razor if I choose to use it in that manner and I curse like a damn sailor. Well, in my case, I curse like a Marine.
There comes a time in our lives when we can’t help but to recognize and be aware of a complete and total shift within our being, a presence of heart and mind so profound that ignoring it is simply not possible. This shift for me happened four years ago and has continued on, strengthening and evolving, bringing me to embracing my truest passions in life and in doing the work that I know I must do.
This shift has once again come for me, and something within me has come alive.
This work, for me, and by the grace of this blog has come in the form of reaching out and helping others, if by only just making someone smile for a minute by reading the words on the page.
So now, this work must continue in a different form. One that was born from the words that I’ve written here. This is the work of mindfulness and gratitude, and inspiring the sparks of passion and hopefulness that live within us all.
And this brings me to where I am now, being full of gratitude.
I want to thank everyone who has followed me for the last four years, and for anyone new to this blog, even if just by a day, even if you’ve only read one post, I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
In the coming days the face of this blog will change, as will the name, as it is time to explore new thoughts, new feelings and new ways to inspire and express. I’m developing a mailing list, and taking down names of all my more frequent visitors, so if I lose you somewhere in cyberspace, trust me that I’ll probably find you again, or you’ll be redirected here to find me.
In closing, I must add..
Life is a journey of heart and mind, and we often come to that point on the road where we don’t choose the direction, the direction actually chooses us. I feel that my direction has been chosen, and I hope to have you follow me there.
Until next time, and until the new journey begins..
Godspeed in all spheres that you travel. Love with all your heart and all the best will happen for you.